When Bad Reviews Make Me Feel Good

I try not to look at my reviews, really I do. I want to either (a) have the strength not to look in the first place, or (b) have the strength not to care. However, since I don’t possess those strengths at all times, occasionally I fall back on one of my default coping strategies: misery loves company. So, I took a little stroll around Goodreads, checked in on some of my favorite books, and took a gander at their greatest detractors. 

I really do feel better!

 

ALIENIST

What it lacks in is an actual story.

 

ANGLE OF REPOSE

I have no idea why I hated this book so much.

 

ANNA KARENINA

Infuriatingly boring.

 

AWAKENING

I’d like to give this book ZERO stars, but it’s not an option. This is hands down the worst book that I’ve ever read. I will never say that again in a review, because this one wins that prize.

 

BLOOD MERIDIAN

It very nearly put me off reading anything ever again.

 

CRIME & PUNISHMENT

Okay, I know I’m supposed to appreciate this book, but all I can do is hate, hate, hate it.

 

DEVIL IN THE WHITE CITY

First of all, I’ve never liked Chicago.

 

DUKE AND I

This book was quite boring.

 

ENGLISH PATIENT

One of my least favorite novels of all time.

 

FLOWERS FROM THE STORM

It was torture to read these tortured characters.

 

GOD OF SMALL THINGS

This is, without a doubt, the single worst book ever written.

 

HONEY IS BITTER

On the bright side, it made me realize that even I could write a book that was good enough to be published by someone.

 

LORD OF SCOUNDRELS

Absolutely the worst romance novel ever!

 

ME TALK PRETTY ONE DAY

Some people just shouldn’t write memoirs.

 

MY ANTONIA

Everytime I see this book in stores, it makes me cringe. I absolutely loathe it.

 

ORLANDO

This book was like the song that wouldn’t end- it just goes on and on.

 

POSSESSION

One of the worst examples of self-indulgence by a writer it has ever been my misfortune to read.

 

POST-BIRTHDAY WORLD

But when I wasn’t curling my lip in disgust, I was banging my head against the wall in frustration and boredom.

 

PRIDE AND PREJUDICE

This book is quite possibly the most insipid novel I have ever read in my life.

 

REMAINS OF THE DAY

I’ve had more fun reading the encyclopedia.

 

SKYE O’MALLEY

One of the most horrible books I’ve ever read in my life.

 

SUN ALSO RISES

Wow, this book was a dud.

 

WHITNEY, MY LOVE

What a horrible book!

 

WOLF HALL

What a disappointment this book turned out to be. which is a shame because it was very expensive!

4 thoughts on “When Bad Reviews Make Me Feel Good

  1. I find that having self-published a short novella, I am getting my first taste with being “published” and all the hoopla that goes along with it before I become a household name (being optimistic never hurts, does it? 😉 ). I’ve checked a few reviews, but I find myself more preoccupied with sales numbers and future royalty payments on the Kindle/Nook/Kobo dashboard, LOL.

  2. I wish I had your strength, lol. I am a first time author, published by a small press. It’s definitely difficult to deal with the harsh reviews. I usually bounce back pretty quick, but some times I find myself questioning my ability as a writer. I try to remind myself that it was my first book, and of course I stil have plently to learn…but it gets ya deep down inside.

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